CANCER: First my
mother. Then my brother. Followed by my sister.
All in 18 months. Whew! Finally, a breather. But
only for two years before my beloved husband was
stricken.
Prior to my late
husband’s departure, he had been community
activist in Detroit for over 30 years. He loved
Detroit and everyone knew it. So often we heard
him say,
"I was born here. Raised here, and I will die
here."
Strangely enough,
following his retirement in 2002, he said, "I
believe I can leave Detroit now." We were
all amazed. Rev. Eddie K. Edwards had been a
Michiganian of the Year, received a Presidential
Award for his community service work, and was
highly regarded by the city, state, and county
governments for his commitment to Michigan. More
importantly, most of our family lives here. This
sudden change of heart was hard for us to
understand. Nevertheless, in December 2003, we
began to make plans to relocate to Texas.
During the Christmas
season, we looked for a home in Texas. It didn’t
take long for us to find a lovely one.
Negotiations began on the purchase, pending the
sale of our Detroit home. We rushed back and put
our home on the market. The real estate agent we
worked with felt sure our home would sell
quickly. We were all surprised when 30 people
looked at the home and, even though many
expressed their love for it, not one put a bid
on it. Thank God they didn’t.
In March 2004, Eddie
began to complain about having a pain in his
side. At first, the doctor diagnosed it as an
infection and gave him a prescription for
antibiotics, which he took for about a month.
When his condition didn’t improve, he had a
biopsy. That’s when we discovered that he was in
stage four of cancer and only had four to six
months of life left! He was a health- conscious
person and it was difficult for us to understand
how his condition could develop to stage four
without us knowing something was terribly wrong.
He left this life in July 2004, just five months
after his diagnosis.
My husband’s passing
left me in a stage of utter shock and the need
to make important decisions alone. But the
transition from wife to widow wasn’t the only
major crisis I had to deal with. Before I could
catch my breath, I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH CANCER
MYSELF. I’ve always been faithful to have my
mammograms on a consistent basis. Upon having my
annual mammogram, the test showed something
"abnormal" was on the film. I needed to have a
biopsy, which I did. The biopsy came back stage
one of breast cancer. Naturally, I was
panic-stricken. Images of death began to dance
in my head. I thought about my mother, my
brother, my sister, and my husband – all dying
from this awful disease.
Once I got over my
initial fears, I rose up and prepared myself for
battle. I have always been a fighter and it’s a
good thing. Now I was fighting for my OWN life
and the life of my grandchildren and great
grandchildren. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! I refused to
sit idly by and watch this deadly disease take
the lives of my offspring.
Being a writer, I
have a very creative imagination. Immediately, I
began to see myself healed – instead of dead.
Instead of writing out my obituary, I wrote out
my goals for the next five years. And I wrote my
autobiography. I also designed and posted signs
all over my home for my eyes to see. One of the
signs said:, "THE BUCK STOPS HERE!" Below is
another sign. I’ve also shared this image with
others going through cancer challenges. I hope
it will help someone else.
When it came time
for my scheduled surgery, I can truthfully say
that all fear was gone. Although I had to go
back twice for the disease to be removed, (it
was so small that it was hard to pinpoint) it
was removed on an outpatient basis! Today, I’m
cancer-free and the buck stops here.
Minister Mary
Edwards Web Site:
http://www.widowswisdom.org
